Holy shit, Rudy Giuliani is going through some (more) things.

The guy really did peak when he married his cousin, didn’t he?

Rudy Giuliani jokes are some of my favorite jokes in all the world. Maybe it’s because they’re just so damn easy and the opportunities are so very plentiful. Maybe it’s because I have the sense of humor of a 12 year old boy. Or maybe it’s because he’s an endlessly evil, corrupt to the core, wildly misogynistic, batshit insane former guy fawning flunky and an all-around generally fucking awful kind of fella.

Actually — it’s all of the above.

“America’s Mayor” he sure as shit is not.

I mean, I guess he could be Mayor of some fictional city on the outskirts of hell or a toxic waste facility or a toxic waste facility in hell where cracked out incoherent zombies stumble through steaming piles of dog shit and unctuous ooze in ill-fitting business suits while muttering something you can’t quite make out but sounds an awful lot like “Truth isn’t truth”.

I get it, once upon a time, he was a fairly well respected dude. Albeit, not entirely as a result of his actions or pleasant demeanor. He did help to break up the mob as a Federal Prosecutor, and it gave him a certain kind of NYC Tough Guy Cred, but these days he much more closely resembles the mobsters he once put in jail than the ‘don’t fuck with me’ US Attorney he led some people to believe he was back then. Of course, this is very much helped along by the fact that decades later, he is now under investigation for a wide range of possible crimes by the very office he led from 1983 to 1989 — the fabled SDNY.