The media is doing it again.

Both sides bullshit bingo. It’s 2016 all over again.

“Is Impeachment the New Normal?”

You know, I think most of us can agree that there aren’t two sides to everything. Sometimes, one thing is just definitively worse than another thing. Sometimes one thing is bad and one thing is not. Sometimes, you don’t have to find the good in one and search for the bad in the other to find the two sides you insist on existing.

Sometimes, like in the case of skinny jeans on Ted Fucking Cruz or Lauren Boebert’s taxpayer funded fun bag being used like a hotel safe lock by her date while she played ‘find the fossil’ over his pants in the middle of a theater full of kids, it is just black and white, BAD.

No “not bad side” to any of that.

Like, let’s say your two kids Johnny & Jane accompany you to the grocery store. If Johnny dutifully helped you check produce for ripeness while recounting his social studies lesson from school that day and Jane spent her time erecting a DIY cantaloupe catapult only to then begin launching said melons across the produce section all while cackling with delight as the fruity gourds pelted unsuspecting grannies in the gut as they entered the store, you probably wouldn’t say to them on the ride home, that “upon reflection, there were high points and low points to the choices they each made in the store.”

And frankly, if you would be so inclined—that would most certainly explain how the hell you ended up with a 10 year old daughter who not only knows how to erect a DIY catapult in a grocery store but also truly seems to enjoy pelting coupon-clipping-Ovaltine-searching octogenarians in the space formerly known as their uterus, but I digress.

For MOST of us— right and wrong still exist. For most of us, obvious distinctions are still a thing. In behavior, character, appearance, etc… For most of us, stewed okra left in a hot car for 4 days would be undeniably repulsive. And the party responsible for leaving said stinky sliminess in said car, would be justly chastised.

Not so for the main stream media of 2023.

Nope. They would take one look at that rancid, sour & foul smelling, nausea-inducing viscous substance and ask themselves the following question— ‘But are we giving too much airtime to the anti-rancid-okra people? We don’t want to appear biased, so let’s make sure we explain that while it’s true that the slimy, mushy, discolored, once edible, now toxic mucus is bad, that the alternative of freshly cooked-not-rancid-okra could be just as bad, even if we can’t really make the point beyond just stating that out loud.’

And yes, this all seems completely ridiculous. If anyone truly tried to make these arguments in the wild, you’d laugh them off as insane and irrelevant. You’d question their credibility. Deservedly. And you’d write such silliness off as the inconsequential musings of an ill-informed idiot.

Only…

This is exactly what our mainstream media is doing. And while it’s nothing new, it is much, much worse than it was, and it’s much, much, MUCH more dangerous.

Let me ask you this — if you were to put Nancy Pelosi and her 35 years of competent leadership in one hand and Space Laser Marjorie Taylor Greene and her QAnon Facebook group informed Marshall Law incompetence in the other, who would you trust to spearhead the impeachment of a sitting president?

If you watched the democrats unveil extremely well vetted, well-articulated and fact-founded investigations during Donald Trump’s two impeachments, and then considered by comparison, the baseless, evidence-free, Benghazipalooza, supposition-symposium at best that will be the “impeachment inquiry” Kevin Reek McCarthy has handed his Spork-footed mistress Marge in partial payment for his empty title and widdle wooden gavel, would you view them as comparable and equal in validity?

Unless you’d hit your head on the corner of that mug cabinet door you always forget to Fucking close while standing up after yet again fruitlessly searching the Tupperware drawer for an ever-elusive matching lid (where the hell do those damn things disappear to anyway) or regretfully rolled the dice on that egg salad hiding out in the back of the fridge for a week, you wouldn’t find them the least bit comparable.

But CNN, ABC, NBC & CBS would.

And I’m not even talking about Fox, OANN, Newsmax or any of that obviously biased crap.

Why would seemingly well-informed, intelligent, responsible journalists do that, you ask? Clearly they know better? I mean, this is supposed to be RESPONSIBLE JOURNALISM isn’t it?

They’re doing it because at the end of the day, the truth is trumped by the almighty dollar. That’s the world we live in. It’s the world we’ve lived in for a very long time. It’s for sure the world we lived in during the lead-up to the 2016 election, when “but her emails” became the epitaph of a lifelong public servant’s political career thanks to the relentless “both sidesing” of a stupid Fucking email server stacked up against an admitted sexual assaulter and orange-painted fucking moron.

And now, they’re taking the entirety of the Chaos Conference of insurrectionists and their four-time indicted melon-hued messiah and turning their hangry-toddler-needs-a-snack antics into some false equivalence, conflict manufacturing, ratings-driven ‘IMPEACHMENT IS TOTALLY THE NEW NORMAL. EVERYONE DOES IT’ both sides bullshit.

Frankly, I’m sick of it. I’m really, really Fucking sick of it. And because I’m me, and inherently a loudmouth pain in the ass, I refuse to be quiet about this.

But none of us should be.

Donald trump was impeached the first time after evidence was uncovered that he extorted another country in order to help himself politically. We all know the “perfect call” that was anything but perfect. There was evidence of his abuse of office. Proof of corruption.

He was impeached the second time because he incited a violent attack on our Capitol in an effort to stay in power. We literally watched it unfold before our own eyes while he did nothing to stop it.

On the spectrum of valid reasons for impeachment, those are very damn well pinned on the side of “yes, this is very Fucking valid.”

And yet, Marge and the rest of the Qrazy Caucus are out there saying out f’ng loud that they want to impeach President Biden as part of a tit-for-tat.

‘You’ll pay for this Joe Biden!!!’

The democrats impeached MAGA’s Orange Jesus (with valid reason) so now MAGA is seeking a “revenge impeachment” of Biden because Trump TOLD them to.

And the mainstream takes that f’ng obvious on it’s face farce and stacks it up against Trump’s totally justifiable impeachments, shrugs and says, ‘Eh, looks about the same to me.’